Month: April 2017
In my previous blog post, I wrote about how you could handle conflicts with your children. I encouraged the idea that you give your kids space to make their own decisions – and ultimately their mistakes. But how do you make sure they have all they need for completing this task?
Everybody knows that there are different theories of raising kids. This one about self-discipline, that I support, is from Dr Thomas Gordon. He was influenced by Carl Rogers. Rogers was a humanistic psychologist. He believed that every person can achieve their goals because they have one basic motive, that is the tendency to self-actualise – i.e. to fulfil one’s potential and achieve the highest level of “being human.”
In my first blog post, I wrote about fighting siblings and how you can handle it. I analysed it in detail and gave the steps towards the solution. Raising teenagers is not easy. Helping with the solution to their conflicts is also a difficult task. But, in comparison to the difference in opinions with a parent, it is peanuts. For the parent, anyway…
The parent always wants to be right
In my long practice working with families, one thing became clear: parents are not really flexible. They usually think that they are right and that the kids are being difficult. They give the same kids little or no space to state their own opinions. Even if the opinion does get out, there is usually no acceptance of a difference in views. Yes, I am also guilty of this. I do find it very difficult to admit that they have this right. And, I do find it very difficult to accept it that they sometimes make a decision that I do not agree with.